Oh beloved March. You bring warmth to Rexburg (warmth meaning a couple of degrees above freezing... yay!), the nearness of the end of the semester, and March Madness! No, this is not the basketball March Madness--which I heard all about the guy getting kicked off of the BYU team for an honor code violation--this is the March Madness where you read the entire Book of Mormon in the month of March. It's something I try to do every year, and it has really blessed my life. This read-through of the Book of Mormon helps me piece all of the stories together, while reading it throughout the year helps me pull out deep doctrine. I like both ways, and it's refreshing to just plow through the Book of Mormon once in a while.
Lately I have been feeling a little lonely. It's not that I don't have a wonderful family to support me, or an incredible roommate to help me as well, but I just felt alone for some reason. I don't have any idea what caused this, but March Madness has come through for me again. I came across a scripture in 2 Nephi 4:26-28 that reads,
"...if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath visited men in so much mercy, why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions? And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, and why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy? Awake my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and no more give place for the enemy of my soul."
These scriptures feed my soul. It may be because I'm an English major, but these words have so much meaning behind them. I can honestly say that my soul has lingered in the valley of sorrow. Linger is such a good word for this feeling--you think to yourself, "You know, I could leave if I want, but I think I'll linger just a little longer." I have totally felt that before. "I could be happy if I really put forth an effort, but I think I'll linger in the 'valley of sorrow' a little longer." How dull!
Do we ever get caught up in the excuse of, "it's okay this one time, I'm human anyway,"? Yes, we are all human. We all make mistakes. But we can't let that deter us from trying to be better each day. I am not saying we need to be perfect. I am saying we should be getting better as we gain more experience. This is something I have struggled with, so don't worry, I'm not judging.
I am so grateful for the scriptures and for the truths they contain. I am so grateful that I have the ability to truly dig deep and study them for myself and still not find a single discrepancy within the scriptures that cannot be answered. It is so comforting to know that there is a book out there that I can rely on to help me get through the day more happily. I know that the Book of Mormon is the most correct book and can bring a man closer to God than any other book. It is something I cherish greatly.
I'd like to close with the lyrics of a song I love called "His Eye is on the Sparrow"
"Why should I feel discouraged?
Or why should the shadows come?
Oh why should my heart feel lonely,
and long for Heaven and home?
For Jesus is my portion;
a constant friend is He.
His eye is on the sparrow,
and I know He watches over me."
